Members of the “Bible Boys” group have been meeting every other week for more than 30 years. (Submitted photo)
When the “Bible Boys” started gathering every other week in each other’s homes to bond over their shared faith in Christ, it was 1993.
And the Bible Boys were mostly young, busy fathers from St. Monica Parish in Whitefish Bay who met later in the evening so they could be home to share in the kids’ bedtime routines.
Three decades later, the world looks a little different. Thanks to modern technology, a person can carry in their pocket a palm-sized computer that contains the entire annotated Bible, apps with prayers in different languages and endless online resources offering a literal world of spiritual formation.
But the Bible Boys are still gathering every other week — because as it turns out, there’s nothing that keeps the home fires of faith burning quite like fellowship and the witness of friends.
“It’s been a band of brothers,” said John Herbers, one of the original members of the group. “And I’ve got four brothers of my own, so I know what it’s like to have a real brother.”
All those years ago, the group — which was comprised initially of Catholics as well as non-Catholic men who married Catholic women and attended Mass at St. Monica — started out with a deep dive into St. Paul’s Letter to the Romans.
“We were all young dads striving to make a difference for our families,” said Dave Carroll, one of the original members who is still active in the group. “Our faith and belief in the importance of community were values that we all shared, and we were eager to learn more about how to express that.”
In the intervening 30 years, the group has continued to cover Scripture study, but they have also delved into other spiritual writings, covering the works of C.S. Lewis, Thomas Merton, Bishop Robert Barron and Pope Benedict XVI, as well as books and articles by Richard Rohr, Thomas Keating and Marcus Borg, to name a few. They have also invited guest speakers over the years, including Fr. Tim Kitzke, Fr. John LoCoco and Fr. Luke Strand.
But the most profound moments come from the conversation that occurs amongst the group itself, said Joe Topp, who has been a member for about 25 years.
“I think the thing I find most beneficial is I can sit there and in each of the different guys, I can witness different ways that they live out and manifest their faith,” he said. “I can see where they struggle with their faith, where they are in pursuit of being better at practicing and sharing their faith. It’s really humbling but reassuring to look at other individuals, at other men, and see how their faith is just part of their core, part of who they truly are. You don’t always get to see that when you interact with people professionally or socially.”
“It’s life through a ‘Catholic man’ lens,” said Lou Baureis, who has been attending the meetings for 10 years. “You’ve got guys that have the same issues, the same struggles, the same concerns, fears, hopes that you do. Guys aren’t always great about sharing. And this is a place and a time that everybody can really talk freely and be themselves.”
Several times each year, the men will get together socially as a group and bring their wives. “These other men really have gone through stuff with us,” said Herbers. “One of our guys lost his wife. One of our guys lost a daughter. Guys have changed jobs. Guys have moved out of town.”
The group’s format is far from rigid, said Topp. “There are evenings when we basically just talk about what’s going on in our families and maybe what’s going on at church, or an article somebody read that caught their interest,” he said.
Often, the focus of the group is dictated by the current state in which its members find their lives. Where they were once fathers of small kids with early bedtimes, they are now dads to grown adults who have faith lives of their own. The challenge of offering a meaningful witness to their children, even as some of those children have fallen away from the practice of the faith, is a perennial topic, said Herbers.
“It comes up just about every other session: How do I help my own children and grandkids stay faithful? That’s a challenge that I hear all the time,” he said. “It’s affirming, number one. I know I’m not alone. Number two, I know I make mistakes all the time, but I’m not the only one making the same mistakes.”
So what’s the secret ingredient to their group? There has been turnover in membership, certainly, but four or five out of the current 10 Bible Boys have been long-term attendees. None of them can say exactly what it is that has made the group endure from the days before email to the days when they schedule their meetings on Microsoft Outlook. But if they had to guess, they would say it’s pretty simple: fraternity.
“With these guys, it’s evident that their faith permeates their thoughts, their actions, their ideas, their perspective,” said Topp. “And being around that is important for me. It’s powerful.”
“Through my experience in the group over the past 30 years, I have come to know more about the Bible, about Christianity, about the Church and about my faith, but it’s not for
‘knowledge’ or understanding that I have kept coming back,” said Carroll. “It’s for the fellowship and for the constant reminder of God’s love for me and for all of us despite the messiness and uncertainties of our lives.”
“We just want to be the best we can,” said Herbers. “This helps us do that.”
