My Faith: Tom Tarkowski, St. Veronica, MilwaukeeRead Time 10 min

• Tarkowski and his wife of more than 50 years, Nancy, together have two daughters, five sons, 15 grandchildren and 21 great-grandchildren.
• Tarkowski studied architectural technology at Milwaukee Area Technical College and worked in the architecture/engineering side of construction. He eventually was offered a position with a new MATC in-house architecture office and retired in 1996 after 23 years. He also is a graduate of Notre Dame High School, which had been located in Milwaukee, and St. Veronica School, Milwaukee.
• A longtime parishioner of St. Veronica as a child and an adult, Tarkowski has been an usher since he moved back to the area in 1964 and is president of the Ushers Society. “We had 10 Masses every weekend, so my father recruited me to help.”
• He is also or has been involved at St. Veronica in many other ways, including being a registered Scout Leader with Pack and Troop 208 for 57 years and singing with Sanctus Choir and Resurrection Choir.

You remain very involved at St. Veronica — in fact, a friend referred to you as “Mr. St. Veronica” — but what are some highlights of your past parish involvement?

It was always fun to work at the annual parish music festival. There was an opportunity to do some things you don’t do in your ordinary living, and the best part was meeting new folks from the parish. We were able to put names to faces we saw every Sunday at Mass and conversely, add faces to the names we had heard often. We were family. Another highlight for me was being a member of the building committee for the Frederick Center. It mainly involved converting our basement church into a gym, and related work on adjacent areas. We were also required by code to install an elevator to serve the various levels in the school.

Is it correct that you have been a St. Veronica member since 1941, when you were age 5 and the parish was just 15 years old?

My mom and dad built the only house they ever owned in the town of Lake in 1941 and we moved from Greendale in October of that year. That house now is about four blocks east of St. Veronica Church, but back then the street didn’t go through. Actually, there was a seven-year gap when I belonged to other parishes, both here and in the Madison area, but St. Veronica will always be home. I expect to be here until they carry me out.

Tell us about a recent special assignment from your pastor.

I was visiting with Fr. Carmelo Giuffre in the parish office one day and I asked him if anyone had started planning for our parish centennial. Mistake. It seemed like he wasn’t aware of St. Veronica’s 100th birthday coming up in 2026, but he might have been just yanking my chain. He said that nothing had been done so far, and would I get a group together and begin planning? I don’t think I ever said “no” to a priest’s request if I were able, so I’ve gotten a group together. They’re very good people, and I’m sure they’ll do a wonderful job.

Why do you remain so active in your parish at age 88?

Age is just a number, and while my body might tell me that I’m getting old, my mind and heart say don’t listen to that crabby old body. If there is something to be done and I can contribute, then I will. It’s hard to hit a moving target, so I keep moving.

Do you have any present community Involvement beyond St. Veronica?

With a brood like ours, we’re always running to some event, so it’s like we have our own community. This past spring, we’ve celebrated two First Communions and a Baptism, all at different parishes. Last year, I started on a new venture. We are having a tremendous turnover in our neighborhood, and I want to know my neighbors. Quaint, right? So, I had a printer friend of mine print up some 3-by-5-inch cards titled “KNOW YOUR NEIGHBOR”. There are lines for name, address, phone, etc., and I had the printer print my info on the card right away. Then I give a neighbor my card and ask them to fill out a blank one with their information, as much or as little as they like. It began quite well, but I’ve been hobbled by a nerve disorder since early February, and things have come to a halt. Hopefully I’ll be able to get around soon. “… but Lord, who is my neighbor?”

As someone who’s been married for more than 50 years, do you have any marital advice?

Never pass up a chance to say I love you. Oh sure, they know you do, but saying it out loud is special. And hug like you mean it. And sneak in a kiss now and then for no special reason. Our children and grandchildren tell us that they model their marriage after ours; we must be doing something right.

What is the best advice you’ve ever received, or the best advice you generally give?

Be happy. Even if you don’t really feel happy, pretend you are because your happiness, real or perceived, will spread to those around you. If all goes well, soon the happiness you’ve displayed will come back to you with interest. This is the day the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad.

What is your proudest accomplishment?

I’m not too big on pride but I am happy to say that I have a large group of folks that I call “friend.” Everyone who has become my friend has been warned that they are now stuck with me for life. Even if you don’t want to be my friend anymore, I won’t let you go. My oldest friend, Jim, and I met in Greendale when we were 2 years old, and although my family moved from there when I was 5, Jim and I are still friends 86 years later. On the professional front, I was honored by my peers in CSI who decided that I was worthy to be a Fellow of the Construction Specifications Institute.

What do you want to get better at?

Just about everything. I love to sing, but my breath control is awful, and I could stand to get much better at that. Also, my computer knowledge needs a lot of work. Technology is not my friend, and I view text messages as antisocial. I don’t own a “smart phone,” but I might be forced into it someday — more learning. Then there’s my golf game (when healthy); anything I happen to do right would be an improvement.

What is something people would be surprised to learn about you?

Anyone who knows me knows that I love to sing. I know the words to at least parts of over 100 songs. What people don’t know is that I am a big band aficionado and even if a tune that I love has lyrics, I often prefer the instrumental version.

What do you like best about summer?

Everything except the bugs. I enjoy working in my yard (you wouldn’t know that to look at it), riding my bike, playing golf and riding with the top down.